15 November 2014

Don't Prompt Me

One of the NaNoBloMo post suggestions was "Write about a skill you possess that someone else might not have".  As I am complete rubbish at anything domestic, I was skeptical of this topic and ignored it.

Then I realized that I used to be a licensed pyrotechnician and I could write about that.  But the nuts and bolts of it are actually kind of boring and I've written about it before. So,  a synopsis: it's hard, dangerous work for little pay but the crowd noise makes it worth it.  I still miss doing it and would do it again in a heartbeat but I was outvoted. (Stupid democracy) 

The other topic would be the racecar but that is all kinds of boy talk that most people think is boring. Something surprising about it is I've learned a lot about physics and geometry over the years.  This is the Universe's joke on me after all my complaints about those topics while in school.

The other thing I could think of is this, the writing.  Explaining something like this is difficult as it's a personal and individual thing.  It's like explaining how one breathes, you just do it.  I guess I could best explain it as I try to write like I talk.  Thus explaining the run-on sentences, random punctuation, spaces, and capitalizations.

The nonconformist in me hates writing prompts a little bit.  I Write What I Want!  It's like having a writing assignment in school sometimes.  Once we were instructed to journal once a week for the entire quarter.  This was before this sort of thing was cool and normal.  To be honest, I forgot all about it. (I know, you're surprised.)   So when the teacher reminded us that it was due in a few days, I had to figure something out quickly.
So, I wrote an essay on why I didn't journal.  Totally got an "A".

Yeah, not much has changed with me.

11 November 2014

Job Search Adventures, continued


 Reception/ Front Desk (Downtown Bellingham)

compensation: salary + bonus
Reception position available at a high-end health and wellness studio. This upbeat environment requires an individual who can demonstrate amazing multitask abilities (workplace kung-fu) during a variety of day-to-day, face-to-face customer encounters. The right candidate for this position is fun, very outgoing, positive, a people-person, as well as loves games and rewards for reaching targets. Reply to this posting with your resume and a brief description of why you would be perfect for the job. Also (VERY IMPORTANT): Put in your subject line: "Kung-Fu master found" so that we know you read the whole job posting.

10 November 2014

What Kind of Cake?

Kevin and I are known to communicate in hyperbole and superlatives. I swear if someone overheard some of our conversations they would think that we'd either gone insane or about to conduct a gun duel.

Kevin's mom often calls to ask if we want dinner or dessert. Often, Kevin will say something along the lines of "I don't know, Mom.  Surely really doesn't like your cooking."  He says it so convincingly too.  His mom, who is really sweet, always seems to accept it on face value.  As if he would ever say it and mean it.  As if I would ever say it, aloud.

Last night, his mom phoned to ask if we would like some cake.  She had some Red Velvet cake last week so Kevin asked if was the week old cake or something new.  This was a half genuine question because she's had strokes and sometimes sh*t happens.  (example: biscuits and gravy with blueberry biscuits or serving cold pork and beans with tacos)

I didn't hear her response so when Kevin asked if I wanted some cake, I sincerely said I didn't want week-old cake.  Kevin repeats what I said and adds "She's such a bitch, Mom."

I was tearing up, I was laughing so hard.  For once, I was serious.

This Week's Edition of I'm a Total Liar

Remember when I said that I had way too many Halloween decorations?  Then I bought the little ghost bobblehead because he asked to come live at my house? Well, then I bought a jack o'lantern bobblehead because: Jack O'Lantern bobblehead.

Look at this happy little family:

I'm impressed that they're not in compromising situation courtesy of Kevin

And then today, things were on sale!  Things that I've been resisting for a month now.  But for $3.00, I can find room for this guy:

C'mon, He LIGHTS up!
 I'm sure I can decorate them for Thanksgiving and Christmas as well.

08 November 2014

Future Operator

Kevin has a pretty dangerous job and I don't often hear stories about what he does. The rule usually is I don't hear about sketchy jobs until they are done, if at all.

Today though was different.

He was running a loader that has a bucket that a small convertible will fit in. A customer came in with a truck and trailer needing material. He had a little boy with him who was having the best day ever seeing all these big boy toys.

After Kevin talked to the dad about what was needed, Kevin explained that the trailer would need to be backed up.

The dad picked up the little boy and put him in the trailer to ride while he backed up a little bit while
Kevin climbed up into the loader to wait.

Once he was up there he looked down to see the boy looking concerned. Seeing Kevin looking at him the boy sternly raised his hand to him, signaling him (appropriately) to wait.

Kevin motioned backed Okay but the boy continued to signal until his dad stopped and got him down.

Kevin loaded the trailer while the little boy watched and nodded.  When he finished and pulled along the trailer, he spotted the boy again.

He was giving Kevin an enthusiastic Thumbs Up.

Kevin climbed down to talk with the dad. He laughed and said "Okay, that was one of the cutest things I've ever seen" and he explained what happened.

The boy nodded while Kevin told the story. Kevin told him "You were safe, weren't you?  You did a good job!"

Can you imagine? Best day ever. For both boys perhaps.

07 November 2014

Dawning Realizations

Remember that scene in Say Anything where they are talking about being married after Lloyd and Diane have sex?  Where they talk about how everything is going to change and the one friend says something along the lines of Years from now you'll be walking along and think "We've had sex."

I wondered about that at the time, if a person would think that.  Of course, I didn't think of it again until many (too many, frankly) years later when I watched the movie again. 

I am unsure if the statement is true or not. I do know that there are moments when it just hits that We Are Married. Right now. Married. I chose this guy. This great guy chose Me.

So, no, I haven't thought that specifically but I've had similar trains of thoughts. That dawning realization of "This is my life right now."

Thankfully, these are mostly happy realizations and not I Need A Good Alibi realizations.

05 November 2014

Immediate Gratificaton for the Win

You know what is strangely satisfying?  Power washing.  Talk about immediate gratification.

Kevin was trying to get about three thousand things done over the weekend.  With the time change, he has very little daylight hours available now.  It's dark when he leaves and comes home. This leaves weekends, some of which he works Saturdays.

He began powerwashing our deck and I stepped out to see what was happening.  OMG, it's like the best thing ever.  Just spray it and it looks new!  Must.To.Do.It.

I offered to help and Kevin was reluctant.  Not because he was doubting my skills but because we have The Deal.  The Deal being that I am responsible for the inside of the house and he is responsible for the outside of the house. This fell into the Outside of the House category.

But the need to get things done in a limited period of time won him over.

I washed the deck until the Seahawks game started.  Then Kevin and I went inside to watch.  At half-time, we took turns washing.  The instant gratification pleases Kevin as well.  Paired with his guilt of sharing chores, there was a bit of a struggle of whose turn it was.

But the game came back on and by the end, it was pouring down rain and getting dark.

Yesterday morning I returned to this most pleasing task.  It was sprinkling and due to storm later in the day so I sucked it up and went outside.  I put on one of Kevin's work sweatshirts, which was bright orange and a little water-resistant.  A little.  By the end, water resistant could be defined as "it has a hood."  I'm sure I was quite a sight, with my orange sweatshirt, red LL Bean slip-ons, purple headphones, and soaking wet.

I did enjoy having my headphones in and listening to my music.  I keep downloading music on my phone but not listening because I'm home all day.  (usually I listen to music like this at work)  I'm sure my in-laws appreciated the singing along and possible dance moves, if they happened to come outside.

I only did the floor of the deck, which is quite large.  It wraps around the corner of our house.  I considered doing the railing but, rain, and the railings are hard.  I'm not so much tall so it's more suited for Kevin.  On a selfish note, the spindles would be frustrating because there are four sides to many, many of them.

This is where I say a task such as this, while satisfying, also has big potential of triggering the ocd.  Because you see your progress instantaneously and it triggers the Do All The Things part of the ocd.
Thus, the not having sense to come in out of the rain.

It just looks so nice. I want to continue but I know that I'll just be frustrated at the difficulty level.  And soaking wet.  And my hands, omg, my hands were so cramped.

As a treat, I took the puppy to the coffee stand and we both got treats.  Then we snuggled with the blanket and watched television. We might have napped but you can't prove anything.


One corner. Totally fun pushing the barbecue on a slippery surface.

Center section. Yep, totally powerwashed the little table too.

Right corner. The light is darker because: RAIN.

04 November 2014

Reasons I Shouldn't Cook

Subtitle: Things that Catch Fire

A. Towels
B. Potholders
C. Waxed paper
D. Paper Towels
E. Boxes
F. Food

This Seems Legit

In the latest chapter of Job Search Adventure, I received an offer for employment.  You look to see if it's a good idea:

Dear Applicant, 
Thanks for responding to the job post. I received your email with interest in the position posted but unfortunately that position has been taken but I have an offer for you if interested. I want to believe and hope I am dealing with an honest, responsible person because I usually would not hire anyone this way but I urgently need the services of a Personal Assistant due to my very busy schedules.
My name is Brenda Palmigiano(Advocate for Deaf truckers) and i also do Interior Designs, Decorations & Art collections with a large client base and because of my job I'm constantly out of the State. My former Personal Assistant just got married and moved to Canada. If you accept my offer, I will need you to take charge of my  errands, and will also have my mails/packages forwarded to a nearby post office where you can pick them from at your convenience.
All errands will be in your city/town so it is not a must you have a car, but if you do it might be a plus. When you get my mails/packages, you will be required to mail them to where I want them mailed too. The content of the packages will be business and personal mails. All expenses and taxes will be covered by me and you are to work for just 2 days per week (4 hours daily). You will be doing this for 3 weeks until I get back to town so we can formally meet and discuss about the possibility of making this arrangement long term if I'm satisfied with your performance.
How much will you charge per week? Am willing to pay $300 weekly including gas and others expenses. That is not a bad offer i presume! If you accept this offer please reply with the following details:
Full Name, Physical/Residential contact address, Apt #, City, State, Zip Code, Cell number, Home number, Current Occupation and Available hours.
I will be needing your service immediately, so once you send all this information, i will make a back ground check on your details and will get back to you within 24 hrs to let you know if you get the job and also what your first assignment will entail. After that, I will request your first week payment be mailed to you along with the pay to run errands for me.
Kindly get back soon and have a nice day. 
Thank you and God Bless!
So, Gmail flagged this as suspicious.  It arrived at midnight on Halloween.  "Dear Applicant"   and Please send me all your pertinent information.   Blindly receive and send packages.

What could possibly go wrong?
It is a real person, I checked.  But she's from New York and the interwebs say nothing about interior design.  I wonder if she knows this is happening?  I'm not wading in though.  I only kept the email for entertainment purposes.
AND THEN, in the same email thread I received:
Good Morning

        Dear applicant, we apologize for the delay in response, as in regards to your resume that was forwarded to our head department for the Data Entry/Administrative Assistant Position, The Hiring Desk  has  reviewed your resume for the Data Entry/Administrative Assistant  Position and we believe you have the required qualifications to proceed. 
This is a Data Entry/Administrative Assistant Position, Working hours are from 8am-3pm, Monday-Friday. The starting pay is $24.00 /hr for this  Data Entry/Administrative Assistant Position, you are also expected to 
come online through Yahoo Messenger during working hours.I want you to setup a yahoo messenger and if you have one already use it, add Mr adam diaz the Interview Manager and IM his on this ID (adamdiaz2014@yahoo.com
asap for the interview/briefing and comprehensive job details.This is our first step to proceed further. he will be on online waiting for you. Interview Schedule date/time is From Monday to Friday  (8am-5pm).

Best Regards

Again, non-specific "Dear Applicant" and the sketchy requirement to set up a messaging service contact.  Then there's the big hourly wage for a job that doesn't require it.  Mr Adam Diaz doesn't seem to exist on the interwebs. 



03 November 2014

The Talk

Swistle had two interesting topics the other day: "Talking to kids about sex without religion"
 and "Teenagers and Dating and Friends"

Not being a parent, I usually don't comment or think much about parenting posts but these really caught my attention.  My first response to the sex and religion this was "One has nothing to do with the other."  But I realize that is only relevant in my world.  It very much relates in others worlds.

I was self-educated on the subject when I was a child.  The class that everyone else had in the fifth or sixth grade was cancelled for some reason and they never rescheduled it.  (at least that's how I remembered it)   My parental talk was "You know about all that stuff, right?"  One of many examples I can provide of being raised by wolves.  Church, as I'm sure you're unsurprised, had no place in the house as well.

Swistle mentioned having books around for the kids to browse in case of any interest.  I thought this was a great idea, giving kids an opportunity to learn in their own time and interest and greatly reducing embarrassment.  One of the books listed was actually how I learned about "all that stuff", at a friends house nonetheless.

Having had issues, shall we call it, as a child and teen, sex wasn't big on my priority list.  I did have the goal not to become an After School Special during high school.  Also, I was in high school during the AIDS epidemic so sex was practically scary to contemplate.  I remember a teacher saying that "Having sex with one person is actually having sex with all the people they've been with as well."
Yeah, that is a strong visual.  Kept me out of trouble for awhile.

I didn't have many rules as a teen.  I had a curfew of midnight but I'm not sure anyone was really paying attention.  I began officially dating at almost sixteen but had done the group dating for a few years prior to that.  Whether or not my parents were aware is a mystery. Teenagers are arrogant and self-centered so who knows if I'd even notice?

Luckily maybe, I emerged from my teens mostly unscathed.  Well, let's try that again.  Not unscathed perhaps. I was married at nineteen, almost exactly one year after graduation, to a psychopath.  So, there's that. 

Another perspective was one of my nieces mentioning something about having sex a while ago.  I was aware that she was active and that her dad had provided the education.  (give a shout out to single dads with daughters, I don't know how they handle that particular area) I told her to just be safe and don't make stupid choices.

The Nephew is pretty open about these things and I'm always impressed at his candor, even if it does make me wince every once in a while.  He has one teen and a preteen right now so he will be living full-time in Hormone City here pretty quickly.

Kevin is very matter-of-fact: It's going to happen so best arm them with the tools and knowledge they need.

I think teens are likely to have some form of sex. This is not new behavior, it's been happning for generations. I think what has changes is education and the removal of shame.

Our friend, Angie, does have a strong faith and coincidentally, the subject came up.  She said that she listed goals that she would like her daughter to accomplish in high school. (she'll be a freshman next year).  The last one on the list was "Don't have sex until after high school."

I thought it was interesting that she acknowledged a) that it is a possibility and b) that she doesn't have an expectation of abstinence until marriage.

I think education and emphasizing safety and respect are the best tools. A parent can provide that to the best of their ability, regardless of religious beliefs. Everything else is up to the teen.

On Fridays, We Wear Blue

I'm not a huge sports fan.  I like baseball and could really enjoy hockey if I dedicated my attention.
Hahaha, like that's possible. I used to watch football but lost the taste for it.

Seattle sports teams are notoriously horrible.  Every once in a while, a divisional championship is possible or even won.  But like a bad sports movie, the teams seem to fold like a bad lawn chair. The exception is the WNBA team, The Storm, but sadly no one watches them play.  Soccer is slowly gaining popularity but the Sounders get lost between baseball and football.

Then came the Seahawks.  All of a sudden, there is a sense of excitement in the air.  Suddenly, everyone is a fan.  When they are playing, the neighborhoods are quiet.  Everyone is watching or listening to the game.  Even Kevin, who is not even a little bit a sports fan, will watch the game.  Even our Canadian friends are huge fans, they consider the Seahawks their team.

Every Friday, "We Wear Blue" is a thing.  If you go into a store, everyone has jerseys or t-shirts.  Cars are decorated.  It's kind of cool.

It's fun to be part of the 12th Man.

01 November 2014


Every November, thousands of bloggers commit to posting daily. I am going to participate and try to post every single day this month.   As we're out of town later this month and I'm not bringing my laptop, this will be a little challenging.  I will have to schedule a few posts, or cheat and throw up a photo or quote instead.

They say if you can do something for 30 days, it becomes an engrained habit.  We'll just see about that.

There is also NaNoWriMo, which is writing a novel in thirty days but I think that it setting myself up for failure. Well, certain failure versus possible failure.

So, let's see how this goes, shall we?

30 October 2014


Unbelievable.  I can't understand how this keeps happening again and again.

I've started this post a few times.  I just cant EVEN wrap my mind around another school shooting, let alone one that isn't that far away from here.   We know people that have children/siblings that attend and work at
the high school.

It's not a typical shooting, which I think makes it worse.  It appears to be an impulsive act of a heartbroken teenager.  It is an After School Special in the worst of ways.

Bottom line: there is no understanding this.

In 21 Days

We booked our trip to Vegas for next month.  I really had reservations (unintentional pun!) about going with the whole being unemployed thing but I figured a few days away won't hurt anything other than our savings.

It will be a working vacation for Kevin because he will be crewing on our friends racecar.  I'm pretty doggone proud of him, as he's grown into the guy that people seek him to help.  With these new responsibilities, he has gained so much more knowledge and skills.   I'm curious to see where these new talents take him in the future.

When he crews here at home I don't usually go with him unless we're racing as well.  Instead, I cyber-stalk him and watch on the track video.  In Vegas I will probably spend more time at the track than usual because otherwise I might not see him much.  Also, I need photos! I do want to watch the racing too, especially since so many of our friends are racing, just not three solid days of it.

This is going to sound a little awful, but the very best time I had in Vegas was when it was just the boys and me. The boys went to the track and I slept in as long as I wanted, I went where I went and for as long as I wanted.  I learned how to drive in Vegas proper instead of just the Strip.   It was truly a vacation for me.

Last year, you might remember, I was super frustrated because a certain family member left her cane home because she "didn't want to deal with it".  This same person needed me to go buy a cane 24 hours later because she couldn't walk.  Also, she doesn't do any of the self care that is required when you have a major injury. (braces, proper shoes, CANE, rest, ice, limited mobility, none of it!)  Copious amounts of complaining and needing accommodations, oh yes that she does.

So, i was hoping that she wouldn't go this year because she recently had another surgery for her injuries but alas, not so much.  The Nephew and Fiance are going so I'm hoping that will alleviate much of the babysitting duties.  Otherwise, I have fear of gunplay.

Next up is the other one.  The other one who is neurotic and makes Eeyore look like Tigger.  He doesn't trust anyone or anything.  The sign says turn left to get to the place with the thing and he will question the sign.  We began teasing him so much that he stopped this behavior, a little bit.  Another example was we had been on the highway to the Grand Canyon for thirty minutes when he insisted that his GPS said we were going the wrong way. He muttered about it so much Kevin got off the highway, asked for directions, then got back into the van without saying a word and returned to the highway we were traveling on.

So, fun traveling companions, they are not.  To add insult to injury, our BFF Mike isn't going this year so he won't be there to provide respite.  I've seriously and sincerely considered drinking again just for this trip.

My plan is to spend more time than usual at the racetrack, even if it is sitting out in the rental car listening to the radio and racing and reading a book.

We have been there so much that we've seen all that we really want to see.  I only have three things on my list this year: the Wheel, the Mob Museum, and taking Kevin up on the Eiffel Tower.  The fact that two of these require heights is not lost on me. My plan is to go at night so one can't quite see how far up you are.  I did the Eiffel Tower in the daytime and that was a big mistake so at night will be much better, for sure.  We're going to do these the first day in town so the remaining days will be at my disposal.

I love the Titanic exhibit and have walked through it twice but I admit I might sneak another visit.  We did all the CSI Experience exhibits so we don't need to do that again.  I want to go to the Arts District too, I've only driven through.  We need to go eat at the PepperMill.  We keep saying we're going to then never do.

So, in three weeks I will have four days in Vegas to break the monotony that is my life right now.  Essentially, I'm just relocating from the couch in our house to the couch/rental car in Vegas. Plus, maybe alcohol.  Or counseling.  Or both.

So, what's my point?  a) we're going even though it's not the most grown-up thing for me to do.  b) we're traveling with very challenging people. c)I'm hoping to spend my vacation reading books and watching mindless television.

Last year, I discovered the show Cold Justice,where they solve cold cases, but in real.  I watched that every afternoon and many episodes of Castle.  I would go upstairs and get a snack from one of the food court restaurants in the early evening so I wasn't stabby when the boys got back.  I had books to read and a view of the mountains and crazy people jumping off the Tower.  It was really nice.  But the mornings were spent sightseeing with someone I didn't necessarily enjoy.

20 October 2014

A Little Happy

In the past month or so I've heard two stories from our friends that just give you faith in humanity again.  With the news being so MUCH lately, I figured it was important to share something that makes us all warm and fuzzy inside.

Our friend is Vietnamese and returns home regularly.  Each year she takes truckloads of coats, clothing, and blankets to leper colonies.  Literal leper colonies.  Any of her extra income goes back to charity not only in Vietnam but here as well.

Her mother is in her late eighties and her health is failing.  They don't have care facilities where she lives so she is being cared for by family.  On one of her trips, our friend showed her mother photos on her tablet.  Her mom was fascinated with being able to see her successful American daughter and her life in the photographs. 

So, my friend made a plan to post photos daily on the facebook and then her cousin shows her mother the pictures and updates.  The cousin reports that this makes her mother very happy and gives her something to look forward  each day.   It makes her so happy, in fact, that she asked our friend to:
"Please write a thank you note to the company for letting her see photos of her daughter and family every day."

I know, right?  How sweet is that?

(Oh, unrelated side note: The Nephew took one of the bigs to Hooters for his birthday. (I wasn't pleased)  He posted a photo on the facebook, showing the big smiling with the waitresses.  In the perfect example of "OMG my mom is on facebook", his great grandma posted a comment saying "Happy Birthday honey. Have fun!" )

Next story.

I keep bumping into our friend and her toddler daughter on Friday mornings at the grocery store.  Julie made the joke that we would see each other next Friday too. Then she corrected herself and said that they were going on a trip.

Julie is originally from Mississippi.  She makes regular trips home but it's difficult for her family to travel this way.  Her grandmother is in her nineties and is about to begin living in an assisted living facility.  She hasn't met some of her other grandchildren or any of the great grandchildren that live on this coast.  Julie's mom had a great idea of renting a motorhome and bringing her to see everyone before she goes into the facility.  She realized that the monthly cost of a facility would be equal to the rental so why not. Julie and her little one are flying out to travel here with them.  (Julie's a CNA)

Isn't that a great idea? I mean, sure, there are plenty of opportunities for things to go wrong but seriously, what a kind thing to do.

So, there you go.  A little happy to lighten the mood.

16 October 2014


I have been home now for much longer than I had planned and it is depressing and demoralizing.  To combat bad things from happening that naturally occur when you've had a sudden and unplanned major life change, I've crept back into old habits that I cultivated when I was home with broken bones. (like writing really, really long sentences)

I still keep a schedule, as if I were working.  As Kevin leaves at 5:30 am, this leaves a lot, lot, lot of  times on my hands.  I have twelve hours to entertain myself. 

To keep track of the days so I don't lose time, I assign specific tasks to specific days.  Things like laundry, shopping, and cleaning.  I am literally telling myself at 5:30 in the morning that today is Wednesday so there is laundry and vacuuming to do.  Yes, I'm all up in the glamour here.

My new best friends Gilmore Girls and old best friends Greys Anatomy help pass the time well enough but one can't spend that much time with anyone without getting a little stabby.  The internet actually becomes boring after awhile, go figure.

One of the recommendations for people battling depression is to have a pet.  I've had dogs for the past 23 years and they do provide for a distraction.  They need feeding and to go outside and come back in and to go outside and come back in (x infinity).   They make a person get up in the morning and be somewhat active during the day.

Lucy is different than our other dogs.  She requires one-on-one attention too. Our other dogs were hunters and security kinds of dogs that just wanted to monitor the goings-on outside. Lucy wants to play and have scritches.  She wants to lay on your lap and sleep. 

This is good, I love this about her.  This is also bad because how in the world of sweet baby jesus are you supposed to get anything done when you've got a snuggly, warm puppy on your lap?  In this case, she is a demotivator.  There are simply few reasons to get up when a puppy is sleeping on you.

I know, you're thinking that a person can still read or use the laptop.  Well, the trouble is that she resents both of those forms of entertainment.  She requires the use of your lap and at least one of your arms and those items impinge on her use.

Yes, she is a dog. I can make her get down and I do.  But, really, why would one do that?  What kind of cold-hearted human would make a snuggly puppy move just so you can go to the bathroom or eat or write? 

Yeah, I need to get over this.  But, seriously:

14 October 2014

They Pay Cash

I had another job interview today.  If nothing else, I am getting plenty of knowledge on different businesses.  This is one that I knew I wouldn't take while sitting in the parking lot waiting for the interview.

One of the many things I do not enjoy about job search is the mystery of applying for jobs online.  Many listings don't include the company name.  I get why, they don't want a bunch of people crashing their gates, but it sure would be a little more helpful to know where you're applying.  I mean, is it like this morning at a place that I wouldn't want to work? Or worse, at a place I've already worked?

On the flip side, the mystery could open up possibilities that a person wouldn't consider otherwise. This is what I tell myself anyway.

Just not today.

It was a job in a medical office when I applied.  When they called, it was for a dermatologist office.  When I pulled up, it was clearly a plastic surgery office.  Shiny new office, discretely placed off the beaten path, smooth jazz playing in the background.

I already knew that I was So Not Interested.  Then during the interview, the person listed a task of "Often accepting $1,000 payments, usually in cash."

Wait, what?

"Oh yes, they usually pay in cash."

"In cash because?"

"They don't want their husbands to know they've had...treatments."

This is where I imagined this:

I believe the person doing the interviewing knew I wouldn't be a good fit.  At least I hope so.

11 October 2014

Picture Wall

Our hallway goes down the middle of our house.  I made it a picture wall, one half that is visible above our couch and one down by my office.  There are single frames and collage frames.  There isn't a theme and four different colors of frames. (gold, black, rosewood, and brown)

I've many, many pictures saved on the cloud.  Every once in a while, I will be uploading more or looking for something and I'll invariably say "I need to print this out."

But those of you who upload pictures of the cloud may know: they can get disorganized really quickly.  I've many duplicates and poorly named pictures/albums.  I feel like I should just bite the bullet, download all of them again, rename them, delete all the ones on the cloud and reload them.
I need a nap and a drink just thinking about it.

So, I indulged in a task avoidance chore.  I drug out the tote that has all the picture frames that I've bought, collected, or discarded over the past years.  The logic being that I needed to know what frames I wanted before I could consider photos.  (I know.)

I have plenty of frames so now I'm back to square one.  Sigh...

Maybe I will just make a list of each family member to ensure that everyone is represented.  I'm not going to worry that each side of the family is equally represented because that would be crazy making and unfair. 

The kids can go into collage frames.  The parents can be in individuals because there are significantly less of them.  I should also sprinkle in a few of our friends photos as well.  I took a candid one that has Kevin, his brother, the boy littles and two of our best friends that I adore.  It's a candid shot and no one is looking at the camera.  It's one of my absolute favorites.  If only I had more of those!


What is too cluttered? Disorganized?  Should I use uniformly colored frames?  The internet says that I should and I think the internet might consider shutting up because that's a much bigger project that I'm interested in.  But, it will look nicer that way.

Should I use a pattern or place them randomly?  They are randomly placed right now but only because Kevin has a weird habit of hanging things too high. (he's six foot tall, I'm five foot three so there's a little wiggle room there)  Also, he wants to make sure that the nails are into the studs.  I planned ahead in consideration of this and bought Command strips. 

I'm trying to channel Swistle's Drop in the Bucket theory.  I've figured out the frames, I have a few photos in mind so that's two drops.  Now I just need to print a handful to get started.

Did I mention that I'm nearly out of color ink?  Yeah, that's another small problem.  Easily resolved but it takes any spontaneity out of the project.

So, that's what I'm thinking about.

See? No rhyme or reason

08 October 2014

Stuff and Things

 I finally took Swistle's advice and tried watching Gilmore Girls.  It's been two days and I'm nearly done with the first season.  I will be sending invoices for my detox/rehab to Swistle.  Lol.  Kind of like Veronica Mars, I am unsure what happened in my life that I'm just now watching these shows.
Also, see you in about a week.

I upgraded our DVR and now I have two DVR's.  I do believe that I've made a mistake.  Now I'm all "Record all the things!!"

While shopping at Target last week I might have bought a cute plastic jack o'lantern.  I also might have wandered down the Christmas aisle.  I did resist buying three little sewn birds because OCTOBER.  Also, don't need them.  Just want them.  Probably will go get them this weekend.

Swistle was talking about planting seeds and bulbs and it occurred to me that every year I intend to do this and every year I forget to do so.  Well, this Fall I have no excuse not to do it.  Other than where to plant them where Kevin won't weed-eat them and where the puppy won't dig them up and eat them.  This is not insurmountable but definitely the kind of thing that slows down the process. I will not be thwarted by the likes of a weed-eater wielding husband or puppy whose nose is her superpower.

I tried Starbucks Iced Coffee from the grocery store and didn't enjoy it so much.  I tried the store brand and hated it.  Finally, I tried International Delight (what a stupid name) and it's not awful.  I doctor it with milk and vanilla and it's the best out of the three.  Now you can sleep at night. 

It's time to switch out my spring/summer clothes to fall/winter clothes.  We're supposed to be going to Vegas next month so I tend to drag my feet about this.  However, I'm not sure I'm going this year (unemployment and other issues) so I'm thinking I'll throw caution to the wind and just do it.  This is the kind of excitement I enjoy these days.

The big project today is to take the five sets of leftover shampoo and conditioner that have been languishing in the second bathroom and combined them.  I have issues. Exhibit A;


Ladies Home Journal has stopped publishing, sadly. What am I going to do without "Will This Marriage Survive?".  In the company's wisdom, they decided that replacing it with Shape magazine as a substitute a reasonable idea.  Gosh, I wonder why they went out of print with such clever management.

I rediscovered how fun the Dollar Store can be.  I needed office supplies, that I would normally just bring home from work, and it was the perfect solution.  I liked being able to buy a few files/envelopes/whatever instead a case of 100.  I know I probably didn't make a good fiscal choice and shut up, I don't care.

With all the time I have on my hands, I've been trying to find things to do to fill my time.  Oh, I know: writing but not so much.  It's the kind of dangerous situation that gets me to thinking "Oh, cactus and ferns would be fun to have in the house."   This is not good and innocent plants may die.

The pantry door has decided that it doesn't want to shut completely.  I asked Kevin about it and he said "Remind me about it" which is his way of procrastinating because he knows I won't remember when it's timely.  I could ask my father-in-law but I have a suspicion that it will turn into a much bigger project than I want it to be.  He has great ideas and is a woodworker, no worries there.  I just know that once started, a remodel will be forthcoming.  Although it would be nice to have a different door.  Meanwhile...ADD is a joy...I think I'm going to look it up on WikiHow or YouTube and see if I can do it myself.  I'll let you know what disaster ensues.

So, that's what is happening here.  Lots of glamour and stuff.

04 October 2014

Unconventional Opinions

Here are a few unconventional opinions that I have:

I don't understand why George Clooney's wedding was treated as if it was a royal event.  I mean, I understand that it's like, and I quote Kevin here: "It's like when that one guy married that woman years ago."

Guesses?  Maybe not.  We've been married one hundred years and speak that old married couple shorthand.  Warren Beatty and Annette Benning.

Lena Dunham irritates the hell out of me.  I think she's pretentious.  She reminds me of  that loud, "artistic" girl in high school that was so Outspoken about how she Didn't Care At All about being popular but, in fact, did Very Much Care.  Also, she used the words "craft" and "art" while being interviewed about her book and show which makes me want to kick bunnies.  She uses more words than necessary and most of those feel like they were culled from the Word of the Day calendar. 
Clearly, she just annoys me.

I don't think Jennifer Aniston was a victim.  I love that Brad and Angelina got married.

I think Beyonce and JayZ are way over-rated.  I don't understand the hype. There are many better singers and rappers out there.

We watched three Oscar Nominated Movies and didn't like any of them.  We turned one of them off about 35 minutes into it.  I'm disappointed and suspicious.

All of this makes me feel old.  As if I've reached the age when I just don't get pop culture anymore.  But I also think that qualifications for being a star and/or a celebrity  are just way, way, way too low.

02 October 2014

Pretty Pictures

I'm trying to take some of Swistle's advice of finding new things to interest me.  I actually sat down and thought about it.  What do I like to do with my time?

Read...well, that's easy enough.  So I made a deal with myself to buy a new author every other week or so.  That's how I read The Art of Arranging Flowers (Lynne Branard) and how I have A Single Breath (Lucy Clarke) waiting for me.

I like to write so I'm going to keep working on that.  I've been sporadic at this so far but every day is a new day. 

I like to take photos.  I'm horrible at taking photos of people, I just don't like intruding and I think that affects the photography.  Often I will try to surreptitiously take them with my phone then crop them to hopefully make a decent photo. 

I am pretty good at landscapes.  I kind of have the perfect canvas here in the Pacific Northwest so it's not all talent.  So, on my phone I have photos of sunsets, cloud formations, pretty flowers.  And many, many of the puppy. Seriously.  Even she is sick of my camera.

So, in this day and age, what could one do with photography?  Hmm, it's a puzzle.  Except it's NOT.  It's called Instagram.  I'm probably one of the few that don't have an account at this point. 

Selfies won't be featured there.  There will probably not be many puppy or racecar pictures even.  I'm going to concentrate on pretty pictures only, for now.

If you're bored, you can find me as Kellwynn93. 

01 October 2014

Life Options

Pinterest has become an interest of mine since I've been off work.  It's a fun little time waster that I can do for a few minutes off and on.  My only struggle is the categories.  Sometimes I find something that I just can't categorize.  I suppose I should just make that a category: unable to categorize.  Instead I have witty titles like Purple. 

Somehow, on my private Pinterest, I ended up following a teenaged girl. She might be a friend of my nieces, I'm just not sure.  (sidebar: I've found Pinterest is an easy way to communicate with my nieces so hallelujah for that)

This girl started pinning photos for a bucket list.  Simple photographs with simple text stating an item.  But they were kind of cool ones, like, "Buy a cart full of groceries for a stranger" and "Try all the items on the McDonalds menu."  I liked how clever they were.

Even though I'm not a fan of bucket lists, or any sort of goal setting actually, I started a Life Hopes board.  Like this:

The fun thing, to me, about this is culling through the bucket list items available.  Probably in denial, I'm surprised at how many of them I've done.  At first I wondered if I had led that interesting kind of a life.  Then I realized that I'm 45 years old and many of the items can be done just by growing up.

But I am considering making another board titled "Been there, Done that".  I think it would be fun to look and have a visual representation of things that one has done or experienced.

There are, of course, things that I won't ever do.  Having a child is an example but that's not by choice.  But on the just Can't Want To level, there are things that are posted that I just wouldn't consider.  Like sky-diving or traveling to the far reaches of the world.  It's fun to think about but most likely never going to happen.

So, again, if you're bored and you need just one more thing to check on social media, find me as Surely on the pinterest. 

I've Got the Time

Usually I am a pretty patient person (don't laugh) when I'm in a store.  I wait for the elderly and people with children.  I use my words and manners in crowded situations.  I'm not usually in a hurry for anything. Probably a window into why I'm late often, but that's another topic.

The other day we had rain after not having it for most of the summer.  While leaving the store, a mom and little boy with brand new rainboots were walking toward me.  So, there were puddles on the ground and a curb to balance on.  Lots of distractions for the young man, indeed.

So, I slowed my pace to let the little guy enjoy his new boots and the fun curb discovery.  I admit, I will often stomp in a puddle if given a chance.  How can you resist?

The mom noticed that I was waiting and encouraged him to hurry because the nice lady is waiting.  I smiled and said "Oh no, I've got time. Let him go. Who can resist puddles and curbs?"   She laughed and agreed and eventually they passed me.

I thought about how nice it is, right now, not to have to hurry back to a job or to be rushed to do much of anything.  I've got the time.

30 September 2014

I'm a total liar

I had errands to do and he was still there. So he had to come home with me.  Had to. 

More than a Boxful

I need to stop buying decorations, seriously.  These are all Halloween decorations.  Some of them can/will be held over through Thanksgiving but still.

This started because I worked at a school and could decorate my office & front desk.  Then I did it at my old work, just on a smaller scale.  This year I only have my house to decorate.  I fear that some of these decorations simply won't make the cut.

And we're ignoring the urge to go buy that ghost bobblehead that's been on sale the past few times I've been at the store.  I don't need it.  Except I do because I have a Frankenstein, a Witch, a Dracula, and a Scarecrow.

29 September 2014

Faith in Humanity

Just in case you're feeling that the world and everything in it sucks, click through to watch this. 
Sometimes people are amazing.  Watch to the end, it's worth it.


Updated Search

Most recent adventures in the job search thing;

This morning I received an email that my ex-husband's dad's company is hiring.  Thanks, Universe, for the laugh.

I had an interview in a coffee shop.  That felt very Seattle.  It was for a tiny non-profit and would be working at home.  I don't know what I think.

I didn't get the job, as predicted, for the job that had all the hoops.  It was a good experience to go through, I guess.  Kevin questioned my sanity for doing it when I really didn't want it. The person who was being replaced was a part of the screening and I don't think she enjoyed me at all. That's okay though, I'm an acquired taste.  She didn't get a Doctor Who joke so I knew I wasn't interested after that.  ("It's bigger on the inside")

The company that required a Tony Robbins screening is, unsurprisingly, still looking for someone.  And still requiring that screening.  Perhaps they should consider taking that screening as well.

Otherwise, my days are still filled with Greys Anatomy, the puppy, a book, and whatever catches my interest.  

27 September 2014

The Light is Changing

I've watched as the mornings return to darkness when Kevin leave at oh-gawd-thirty. He leaves so early and it stays dark for a while afterward that it's a little creepy if you have an over-active imagination.  I don't usually shower early during the winter months.

 I've watch the light change as it shines through the back door windows throughout the day.  Even here in my office, the sun stays behind the trees instead of pouring in the window most of the day. A month ago it was too hot to sit back here and write and now, it's nearly perfect.

The light is different when I walk to get the mail in the evening.  Now the road is in the shade and I can see the beginning of the sunset reflected on the neighboring hills.  It won't be too long and it will be too dark to walk down after Kevin gets home from work.

The sound is different as well.  Now there is a constant chorus of falling leaves.  The birds have quieted, with the exception of the bluejays, who are suddenly obnoxiously loud. And then there is the rain.  After a long, beautiful summer, the rain has returned.  It was gone for so long, it almost seems foreign.

It was a lovely summer and I'm a little sad to see it go.  I'm grateful to be able to watch the change of the seasons.

Good Thing/Bad Thing

Let's play Good Thing/Bad Thing.  We went racing, finally.

It rained all day on Friday
I was able to be snuggly in the truck and read all day (The Art of Arranging Flowers)

We didn't run well.
We figured out the problem.

We wore our new race team shirts
There was a little bit of envy from someone who will remain nameless

Our friend wrecked his car
Because of safety rules, he's totally fine.

Hotel for two nights...there are no bad parts of this.

Watched our friend race his brother's car for the first time since his suicide...this was good and bad.

I jogged a few steps, for the first time in 2 1/2 years.
It wasn't pretty.

Saw all of our friends for three whole days.
Now race season is over.

Vegas is in 52 days.

26 September 2014

Who Locked the Door?

I just returned from doing errands to find my door deadbolted.  The only time the deadbolt is used is if I'm home alone and it's dark outside.  As my in-laws live right next door, our door is sometimes not even locked.  (Welcome, burglars reading this, come right in)

I can't figure out how this happened.  Kevin is at work and his parents were home when I left.  The deadbolt has to be locked from the outside by a key unless you're leaving via the window. 

Unfortunately, the first thing I did was look for damage or items missing but there was nothing.  Lucy wasn't even a little bit concerned as well.  As her super power is her nose, she would totally know if someone strange was in the house.

That being said, yesterday Lucy kept randomly barking.  Usually she'll bark if she hears Lucky outside or sees the bunny in the yard.  She usually barks with a purpose.  If she doesn't seem to have a purpose, I will usually say aloud "Stop making the puppy bark, Dad.  You're getting her in trouble."

So, of course, that's who I'm assuming locked my door.  We're being haunted, obviously.

24 September 2014

Fall is here

Taken after a day of rain.

17 September 2014

Social Media Woes

Kevin gets up at 5:00 am on workdays.  The other morning he mentions he got a facebook message overnight that he didn't understand.  He mentioned the sender and I cringed a little. Somehow a childhood friend of mine somehow managed to message Kevin.  A boy, nonetheless.  It took me a second to realize what was happening because: 5:00 am.

As one would guess, it was the drunk dial of personal messages.  Luckily and with great relief, it wasn't a "You up?" kind of message. Instead it used a horrifying childhood nickname that I loathe (based on wearing glasses) and was wanderingly about the racecar.

So, that was cozy.

Two days later, I received a call from a long-distance number I didn't recognize.  I don't answer any strange numbers so I let it go to voicemail.  It turns out it was a former employee who wanted to stage a practical joke for my old boss at the school.  Yeah, no, not happening.

Firstly, it's a girl that I went to high school with and I was friends with her brother back then.  When meeting her at the school, she totally denied knowing me.  This was a bad call as I was her boss but it turned out she was kind of a hot mess so it made sense in the end.

Secondly, I have no interest in a) playing a practical joke on anyone. I hate them and please take note of that people I know IRL.   2) clearly she didn't know that the relationship did not end well between the former boss and myself.  So I didn't call her back.  My voicemail message is generic so it wasn't obvious that I was purposefully ignoring her.

Thirty minutes later, I get a text stating that the prank is off because another employee that I also didn't enjoy couldn't make it so we would do it another time. But that we should get a drink sometime.  So, we're besties now.

This new social media world is messing with me.

16 September 2014

Thanks for Habits

I misplaced my debit card today, well actually, a few days ago. The scary thing was the last time I remembered having it was on Friday at lunchtime. 

The not scary thing is that I'm a person of habits and systems.  Because I know and recognize that I have a short attention span, I have safety precautions in place.  When I get gas in the 4Runner, I put the cap on the tire so I don't forget and if it's the truck, on the toolbox so it's in my face.

The same with my debit card.  Nine times out of ten I will have left it in my pocket.  Usually my jeans but sometimes my hoodie.  Always the left pocket, more because I'm mostly left-handed than by design.  Once I left it on the toolbox and began to drive home.  By the grace of all things holy and sweet baby jesus, it was still there when I stopped.

So, when I was in town today I had a twinge of panic but not a full blown freak out.  Because I've met me.  And I've been, like, three places in seven days.  It really was a narrow field to search. 

But I still nearly dumped the 4Runner on its side to make sure I didn't throw it on the passenger seat or absentmindedly put it in the console.  Nope.  I did discover that a certain puppy sheds more than I realized and I need to vacuum.

The last place I could remember using my card was...sing along with me now, if you don't get this, we might not be able to be friends anymore...at the coffee stand.  (I had a half-day interview that was 11-4 and didn't allow time for lunch so I grabbed a smoothie instead. Who does that?)  It wasn't there though. I might have muttered.

I returned home and put everything away before starting to search because I can't focus in clutter.  Then I went to change clothes because this wearing pants thing is really starting to bum me out.  (Yes, I remember glorifying the wearing of pants after three months of not. I'm so over that.)  I looked in the pockets of the khakis I wore and it wasn't there.  I looked in the hoodie that I wore at the same time and nope.  Now, I am a little panicky.  I haven't been anywhere. 

I tried to remember what I wore over the last four days.  A purple fleece that I wore somewhere...totally can't remember where...and viola!  there it was, in the left pocket.

Let's hear it for habits that keep the absent-minded people like me in check.